EMO ELMO :)

Rose

2012-02-14T17:24:00.002+08:00

Today just reminds me how forever alone i am.

Happy Valentines Day! :)

last 15

2012-01-20T22:39:00.003+08:00

20th January 2012

My last day of being 15.

It feels weird, somehow.

A part of me feels sad, i think i'll miss being 15. But i think im mostly happy and excited! :D

I've been through so much. And so much has changed. sigh, i just hope for everything to be better.

Anyway, since im turning 16, its gonna be a new start.

Hope the year goes well! :)

Also, im sorry if i've offended / insult / make you feel uncomfortable or whatsoever. sorry x1000

Please forgive me and my stupidity.

IMMATURITY KEEPS ME YOUNG!

have a great night.

Dont forget to wish! ;p

Brother's birthday's the next day. :D

Frosty the snowman

2011-12-25T22:30:00.004+08:00

say hi to ze new haircut.

hehe.

Merry Christmas readers! :D

Will update really really soon.

Gotta go spend some quality time with mummy naooo.

Hope you all have fun this christmas. :)

To live

2011-12-15T15:23:00.002+08:00

Ileum has the greatest surface area in the alimentary canal.

Why?

Because the inner walls of the ileum has numerous projections called villi to increase the surface area for absorption of dissolved food substances. The surface area is further increased by tiny microscopic projections from the epthitelial cells of the villi called microvilli.

Happy Holidays :)

Shooting star

2011-12-12T23:35:00.000+08:00

Hi bunny toufu, professor lamb.

I've missed you alot.

Someday

2011-12-08T17:24:00.004+08:00

People should stop blaming others for everything. they should stop and look at themselves. see if its really their fault, see if they were the one who started causing shits to happen.

Yes, this includes myself.

Recently, ive been talking about people a lot. In a bad way, very bad way.

Sometimes i just hate how mean i am. And the word i hated to most, rude. I always hate it when people call me rude. But now, when i think about it, i realized that they werent wrong at all. im indescribably rude. Not that i dont know that last time, but i just dont know how to stop.

When i came to this new school, i wanted to change. I thought i could change this shitty attitude, i just didnt want all these to happen.

Well, i was changing, but still, i dont know how things started to become so shitty.

i always talk bad about people behind their backs, but when people talk bad about me, i found out how much i hated it.

And when i talk about people, about how bitchy and how much i hate them, i realized how much i was reflecting myself. I know that they (aka backstabbers) talk and hate everybody (including real close friends). Not to mention that i am one of them too. Still, i hate it. i hate how bitchy i am. how shitty my attitude is towards people.

I know, that small scratch on my phone seems to be nothing. But i just cant get over it. i dont even know why.

I know people have been talking behind my back about this. Of how petty i am to not forgive that person.

It's not that i dont want to. Do you think disliking someone feels good? it sucks okay.

I dont hate him, im just pissed for what he did. Somehow, i'll get over it.

Sigh.

I dont remember how many times ive raged these days. I get pissed so easily. OH NOOOOOO. i shall stop.

REALLY REALLY STOP. and be a harpy kid. C:

Forgive and forget.

We had our Christmas assembly today and i got so many chocolates :3

IM A HARPY KID!

Anyway, camp is tomorrow! :D

First camp, hope we'll all have fun and be alive ;D

its gonna be okayyyy

2011-11-26T22:34:00.003+08:00

092382838175350=3-450-102838172636152341652342423049

ADD MATH PAPER NEXT WEEK.

DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE.

4 more papers to go and i cant wait for it to end!

sometimes i feel so stupid for being so stupid.

Why cant i study properly, put in more effort and work harder. All i do now is WISH, HOPE. hope i get good results without putting any effort in studying.

#foreverstupid

2334789249-028197367=`9012934736754625368192839-1209492863

LOGARITHM!

Is the worst thing ever. worst worst thing ever.

true colours.

2011-11-19T14:36:00.004+08:00

Its okay if im being ignored.

Its okay if im being left out.

Its okay if i have no friends.

Cause im tired of trying to fit in.

Tired of this shit.

Better off alone.

bitch love.

2011-11-15T22:20:00.004+08:00

Happy Birthday Bitch. <3

we're too close for birthday posts, right? :p

our agreement says everything.

you better miss me everyday, every minute and every moment in your life.

Because i will too.

Im sorry i couldnt be there to give you my BIG sweaty hug like last year, but 2 years after, we're never gonna miss birthday celebrations, OKAY?!

2 years and still counting.

Best wishes. :)

promise.

11/11/11. 11:11 :)

2011-11-11T21:21:00.007+08:00

i decided to blog on this very historical day. so, HI! ;D

School was pretty depressing for the pass few weeks, but its getting better naoooooo. YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY! :)

I actually wrote a suuuuuuuper long, stupid, demotivating post, but i deleted it.

it's about what i've been doing for lately, but it doesnt matter already. Im gonna do the right thing, not gonna screw my life up again.

YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY! :D

Note to self:

Work hard, make your dreams come true.

No excuses, no procrastinations.

Today's 11.11.11.

Dont forget to make a BIG wish at 11.11pm.

Have a great weekend :)

MISS.

16

2011-10-24T09:50:00.001+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FATSETTEE!

Reblogged @janet.

2011-10-19T20:10:00.000+08:00

What it feels like when both your heart and mind collapse, and your body refuses to do so?

It feels like.... stabbing pain. You just can't find anything worthy in yourself. There's no point living in this world because you don't feel important or accomplished. And yet you cannot die.

That's exactly what I'm feeling right now. The feeling of being stuck in the middle.

As a student, academics are prioritized. You screw it up, you have not fulfilled your job as a student. The competitiveness of this society pains me, because it constantly reminds me how bad I am in comparison to others. How i always pale down. How I'm always a loser. Add in complains by others because they missed the mark to A , I hit rock bottom since i failed. The fact that i did studied hurts more, because it signifies my lack of intelligence and ability.

Am i really, good enough to study here?

Now I live life like a zombie. A zombie that lacks joy, emotions, and laughter.
But life still goes on, because it's not my turn to die.

moodswingsbitch

2011-10-07T15:17:00.002+08:00

sosadsodepressedsoshitty.

when you can't turn to your family, who can you turn to?

FatYeong

2011-10-02T10:16:00.006+08:00

Goodmorning erribady! ;D

I havent been blogging lately and i know that the previous post is sooooo stupid, but thanks for reading! hehehehe.

Okay, anyway, this is what happened recently.

I've joined Tanarata for two weeks, and now im back in Cempaka, for PMR.

It somehow feels good to be back in that shitty school because ive missed them, abit. :p But, im so dying to go back to Tanarata. that place is so so so so so much better than that shitty school.

My eyes are blind. BLIND. i checked my eyes last week and the guy said that im going blind.

No lah, joking.

But, i got my new nerdy glasses! :D

I've done something really retarded last night. Guess what.

nerdy much? :D

SCROLL DOWN!

THE TRUTH IS, this is how normal i look. ;)

This is for all the stressed up PMR candidates and my lovely (not) readers! Hope this is retarded enough to make you laugh! :D

Have a nice day and good luck to all Form 3s. :)

moves like jagger.

2011-09-29T22:14:00.004+08:00

I wanna be a monk.

Im so tired of life already. but i dont wanna die.

i'll update tomorrow. or tomorrow's tomorrow.

or maybe,

tomorrow's tomorrow's tomorrow. :D

night peeeeeps! ;)

Airplanes

2011-08-29T00:39:00.000+08:00

Ni hao yo!

I think i have nothing much to complain about anything that happened recently.

My results, aint that bad. In fact, i've improved sooooo much. Much thanks to Rachel and Jason! Group studies were pretty much productive and they were fun! :D

Sejarah and Geography went better than expected but of course, there's space for improvements. ;)

Life isnt that boring either. I've been talking a lot with "the man" lately and it's fun cause we have the same taste in music. :D

Jia Yee's been talking a lot about our favorite topics and we get so excited, i wanna slap her so hard. hehehehe.

Rachel never fail to make me laugh cause her annoying voice just drives me crazy. She's been repeating this very annoying poem and i wanna slap her so hard too. hahha.

The only thing i dislike is twitter. Idiots wont stop spamming the timeline and i swear im gonna unfollow him/her the next time i get annoyed by his/her shits.

It's midnight now. I think i've gone crazy.

Anyway, people should keep their promises, agree, no? :D

BYE, NIGHT!

die

2011-08-25T18:39:00.002+08:00

I am so tired.

I pooped non stop today. My stomach hurts like crap and no, it's not period.

I kept pooping and pooping and pooping and pooping.

And now,

I still wanna poop.

kill me now.

Happy Hungry Ghost Festival! :D

Main Title

2011-08-20T09:32:00.007+08:00

Morning evelidabody!

Let me tell you something you will never believe.

Or maybe you will.

I slept at 10.30 and woke up at 8 today. ;)

I feel so healthy now. B-)

As promised, :)

this was everyone's reaction when jason wore my glasses around the class. :D

retard (her)

another retard (her)

most retarded (her)

Lam looks like a cow, or a donkey. i dont know.

So lame (her)

So cute (me)

awesome (me)

8-)

retarded as usual (him). I look damn yucky in Masaki's glasses. :/

double specs. how do i look? :D

wont stop being retarded (her)

Lesson learnt, not to put your face too close to the camera.

They said i look lala in this cool glasses. but its ok because i dont take picture like:

jokes. :D

Every picture looks the same but it's so fun camwhoring. I guess it doesnt matter to look retarded. :D

I've been texting so much lately. So many people and so many messages. I hope my phone bill this month isnt

School's been so busy lately. We have SOOOOOOOOOO many exams coming. Sometimes i just wish to flunk everything. But i dont REALLY wanna flunk everything, of course. I will not accept the fact that i am getting shitter results than im getting now. You know the feeling when you get your paper and you see a BIG F there? ouch.

PMR is such a pain in the ass. I have to go out today and get stupid ball point pens. Why dont they allow gel pens? ball points are stupid and retarded and lame and sucky. It makes my handwriting horrible. Not to mention that i have very pretty handwritings, but still, ball point pens are a waste of money. grr

"Don't judge the day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant."

Have a great day ahead everyone! :)

我唯一爱的就是你：）

2011-08-16T23:46:00.000+08:00

Hello!!!!!!!!!!

i know, i know. I havent been blogging for ages and the reason why im blogging today is because...

TOMORROW IS A HOLIDAY! And of course, im a happy person living on earth. :)

Nothing much really happened lately.

Actually, a lot happened lately. I dont even remember much.

Recently, one of my mom's restaurant was burnt down. I dont know how and why but it's damn scary. It was obviously not an accident because that idiot tried to steal money from the cash register and he pooped in the kitchen and ate all the ice-cream when he couldn't find any, then he set the restaurant on fire. His poop was smelly and yucky and disgusting. ewww.

My results have been dropping like crazy. You will never know how shitty my results are now. I see everyone improving and working so hard but i think i've lost the motivation to study. Studying gets so boring and nothing goes into my head. I had group studies and i think it's been helping me alot. I might flunk every single paper if i hadn't had it.

I lost a/some friends lately. To be frank, i dont feel sad at all. In fact, i feel relieved. Yes, we were best friends and we were really close. But what do i get in return? i hard stab in my back. Im not gonna call her a double faced bitch or backstabber anymore, cause it's lame. fine, im sorry for all the swearing but i dont think that anything i said about her is wrong. Do you think cheating is something you should be proud of? I didnt even tell any teachers about it and by that, i think im very kind already. Im really lazy to say the whole story nor do i wanna tell the whole world about her perfect attitude. I dont really wanna spoil her reputation. All i wanna do now is thank her. I dont know how to explain this but she's the one who made me happier. :)

Im transfering to Tanarata next month. Seriously, I dont know if it's something good, or not. Somehow i feel that my school life in Cempaka is getting better. I have better relationships with my friends and i have more friends now. I will definitely miss them but i really dont wanna leave them. But it's not like i have a choice now. :(

My brother's getting married. October, i think? WAH! This is gonna be the first marriage where i get to sit in the front row and go into the bride's room. And i hope a new member will pop out real soon cause i wanna be a 小姑！Can't wait to buy him/her presents and carry him and hug him and dress him. :D FUN FUN FUN FUN.

Remember the surprise i mentioned in my previous post?

I decided not to do the piano cover thing cause i think it's lame and boring already. i play it everyday, but i still suck at it. Maybe next time. :)

The second surprise is...

TADAAA!

Meet my new BOBBY! :D

The camera quality kinda suck but, i like it. The keyboard's so cool.

And i dont understand why i didnt wait for 9810.

Today's a great day, i think.

Except for the last two periods of Science. We had the super ultimate boring workshop where i was so damn tired and i couldnt see anything.

I camwhored with Siew Jean's damn cool glasses during free period. 8-) The camwhoring session with BunnyLam, Rachel, Nirvana and Jason Zai was damn fun.

Pictures will be posted in the next post and i hope you dont go blind. :D

Happy people is going to bed now.

Bye! :)

Every sweet day

2011-07-12T20:31:00.004+08:00

Hello everyone!

My week's been really productive/unproductive. i dont even know.

Anyway, i have 2 surprises for you.

First, i wanted to do a piano cover on the Dream High theme song. which is known as Dream High. just so you know, Dream High is a really cool korean drama, and you should watch it if you havent. Okay, i wanted to do this cover, but my mom borrowed my DSLR to some i dont know who person. However, i will do the cover, as soon as i get my DSLR back.

Next is a secret surprise. i dont know if it makes sense or not but i will tell you this surprise in my next blog post. so, keep reading! :D

Finally, it's July 12 today, if you've realized.

So, i would like to wish these people.

1. Raymond Yeong

2. Leon Yeong

Happy Birthday! :)

They are so important and already so special, there's no need for a birthday post la, right? :)

All the wishes are wished in our lives. So, happy birthday and best wishes.

Im gonna put a cbox into my blog soon be sure to leave a message.

Bye :)

guess who turned 18

moooooooooooooo :D

2011-07-08T23:21:00.000+08:00

TELL ME WHY IS NIKCHUN SO CUTE.

what are words.

2011-07-02T14:23:00.002+08:00

Hello everyone!

I've been looking at old (not really) pictures for the past few hours and you know what? :)

I found out how much we've all been through together.

In this 2 and a half years, i've made so many new friends, and also lost alot of friends, i dont even know why.

I once thought that we could be like this forever, not kids. But best, closest friends. We used to share almost everything together (not toothbrush), but everything seems to change now. Well, everything is obviously gonna change as we grow older. We care so much about results, fame and everything we used to not care about.

This happened to me my cousins. we used to be so close, wee have this super warm relationship. We used to talk about our dreams, future and what we're gonna be together. Like, we're gonna form a vocal band like F.I.R and stuff. Lame, i know but it was so fun talking about it. These relationships and dreams fall apart as time passes by. We dont msn, text, skype, hang out together so much anymore. In fact, we dont even do that now.

Of couse, we dont share the same dreams forever, our dream changes as we grow up. They go to college, make new friends, get their own girlfriends/boyfriends, live their own lives and pursue their own dreams.

But it's okay, because i believe that i will do the same. I will move on, make new friends and do whatever they're doing now when i reach their age.

Well, at least i have all these wonderful pictures to keep these memories.

SO,

i decided to bring my camera wherever i go and take shit loads of pictures.

okay, BYE!

everything.

2011-06-29T19:50:00.002+08:00

hello readers!

I've been really busy these days so forgive me for not blogging.

Wanna know what i've been busy with?

EXAMS.

Im so sick and tired of these bitch papers and homeworks and studying.

We had our Drill exams this week, and i've not been studying for it, i am not even ready for this shit.

We had our Science paper yesterday and i answered everything stupidly. Im not careless, i just dont remember facts and formulas and practically everything. When the question said:

Give an example of an animal with exoskeletal system, and guess what i wrote.

ELEPHANT

elephant? elephant? elephant? what bullshit. :( See, i dont even remember what exoskeletal system is. PMR is in 3 months, i think.

I dont understand why we have to sit for these drills, neither do i understand how i worked so hard and get such good results for mid years. Why cant i do it now? :(

Maybe this suckish drill results can motivate me to work harder. it must.

i'll be back.

2011-06-26T16:09:00.001+08:00

i stop breathing whenever i see him.

(finger) you

2011-06-22T21:29:00.004+08:00

Dont take things for granted, bish.

I take back everything i said to you, you are not worth anything of it.

Please dont go too far, or you'll really be the one everyone secretly hates.

dream high!

2011-06-08T15:49:00.004+08:00

I woke up at 12pm today and had my breakfast at 1pm. i swear i didnt plan to wake up so late. and i swear that i really really had set my alarm at 10am but it didnt ring.

i'm having my 2 weeks mid year holidays now. I spent 3 days on tutorials, the first week has passed and im left with 4 days of holiday. I actually planned an outing with my friends but nobody seems to care. So, nevermind.

It feels like things are harder to cope. It's JUNE already. But somehow it feels like February. ass, it's freaking june already. To be honest, i havent been doing anything productive this year. I've been slacking around and i dont remember the PMR countdown thing. I think i should at least get a book to read or something, but instead, im wandering around the house looking for food.

Im pretty much broke now. Like seriously broke. i have never in my life felt so broke. I have to save money, SAVE MONEY! but it's never so easy to save money. i have shit loads of stuff to get this month.

Anyway, i was planning to rant bullshit but i just ran out of mood. Life is so boring and i feel so dead. i dont know when was the last time i went swimming. I am fat and flabby. and i stink. im so lazy, i wash my hair once in 3 days. what bullshit.

But i want to swim, im dying to get into the water.

i dont want school to reopen, im so dead for exams. :(

NI HAO!

2011-06-07T15:53:00.004+08:00

Meet my cousin brother! :)

who says.

2011-06-05T22:34:00.003+08:00

HELLO READERS!

seeee, i told you i'll update my blog during the holidays. This shows how bermoral i am. Of couse, i am someone who menepati setiap janji.

So,

forget about the to-do-list i made from the previous post. I failed. But, i will do everything listed tomorrow. BECAUSE, tomorrow is MONDAY!

Or maybe i'll just make a new list.

Tata.

Mr Taxi

2011-05-30T21:26:00.004+08:00

From tomorrow onwards,

1. i will not go crazy over dramas.

2. i will not go out and waste time anymore.

3. i will go jogging once a week, even if i have to jog alone.

4. i will study very very hard.

5. i will complete ALL homework.

6. i will sleep before 11.45pm on weekdays.

7. i will pay full attention in class.

8. i will be a good girl.

9. i will try my best to be a better person.

I HAVE 2 AND A HALF HOURS TO BE THE CURRENT ME.

drama time 8-)

Breakeven

2011-05-29T14:55:00.003+08:00

HELLO READERS!

I know how long i havent been updating my stinky dead blog. so, i promise to update during the holidays.

I've been really busy lately. We had our mid terms, i dont remember when, but it ended.

I dont know when i started working so hard for exams. I usually just bring the subject book home and leave it on my table, wouldnt even bother flipping through it.

But, i've been working so hard lately and, all the hard work paid off. ;)

Well, i dont get EXTREMELY good results, but at least i've improved in most of the subjects. At least i passed maths. 8-)

I went to Tanarata and sat for the entrance exam. I failed my maths with flying colours. But i passed the exam anyway. My mom paid the school fees and deposit and everything already.

The principle said that i have to (as in, must) join the school next term, which is September 2011. Also, im suppose to sit for PMR. (wth?)

So the principle and cempaka suggested me to go to Tanarata at September and go back to Cempaka at October to sit for PMR.

Do you understand?

It means that i have to skip one month of school in Cempaka, which also means that i will have to skip the most important month before pmr, all the revisions and stuff. And also, it means that i will not have any holidays this year. I will not get to enjoy myself and have a great time after PMR.

I seriously dont know how im gonna do that, and why i got myself into this.

To make myself happier, i shall remind myself that i dont have to take SPM. Which means that i dont have to study BM like crazy.

yay.

Okay, i have to wash my stinky hair now.

BYE!

remember not to miss me too much. :)

We have 3 months together, waste it wisely.

自以為

2011-05-11T21:43:00.002+08:00

I'm really broke. no joke, really broke.

I cannot even afford to buy a plate of 6.50 noodles. Pathetic, very pathetic.

My mom havent been giving me my pocket money for weeks and i have no choice but to bring my own food to school. well, i obviously wouldnt mind bringing my own food to school, since the canteen food is extra tasty.

But the problem now is that the school teachers wants us to get some past year question books and it is COMPULSORY. I told my mom that i needed around 50 bucks to buy everything, including the stupid expensive ruler ms tai wants us to get.

She told me that she only had 5 or 6 bucks in her purse and she told me to take it if i want. PLEASE, not like im spending all these money on food or whatever stuff you think is bullshit. im spending these money on books, EXERCISE BOOKS.

Oh wait, now i remember. Daughters are prolly just useless in the family. RIGHT? if it was your sons that were asking you for money, i guess the first thing you'll do is grab your car keys and drift to the bank, redrawing all the money you have in there.

And, dont you forget, that your sons hardly ever spend your money on any productive things. They eat all the pizza they want, eat all the expensive high classed food they want, but you think all that money spent are worth, because your sons give you a hug and a big smile, telling you what they ate and what they bought.

What about me? Im stuck at home, eating potatoes. wtf?

I once thought that everyone deserves to be treated fairly, even poor or stupid people. But everyone in the family just wont stop telling me that nothing is fair, how fair can the world be? I once thought that i could make everything fair.

But now i understand what everyone is trying to tell me,

that life isnt fair, what can you do about it?

Okay, i can do NOTHING about it.

I just hope my eyes wouldnt look so sore tomorrow.

Im going to bed, BYE.

The lazy song.

2011-05-05T20:34:00.004+08:00

Im having a lot of difficulty catching up with my studies lately.

Mid-year's in TWO weeks, and i havent studied everything. Despite the fact that i havent been putting any effort in my studies for the last two years, im working really really hard now.

But, nothing goes into my mind.

Well, they do. But after touring my brain for awhile, they go back to where they belong, which part of my brain looks like KLCC? I have short term memory and i dont know why my brain is grown so small.

As if the stress is not enough, we have this Dixit competition to participate and it's compulsory for us to submit AT LEAST 4 pictures and drawing. The due date is this Sunday and i still havent done anything, neither do i have any idea of what to do.

Then we have another i dont know what competition to participate. We are skipping a lot of classes, doing organic paint and doing all the weird stuff.

It is fun, but somehow, i think it isnt the right time to do these competition thingy.

IT'S PMR YEAR, HELLO.

I've been really really really really stressed these days. But that's not the worst.

My family, especially my mom, have been complaining how retarded i've been lately. like how i stay in my room and study the whole night or sometimes the whole day.

why can't they just shut up and give me some support.

I study, they complain.

I dont study, they complain.

WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?

I dont feel like studying today. But i can't afford to rot anymore.

School is horrible, i hate studying now.

P.S.

2011-04-28T18:44:00.000+08:00

BETTER OFF ALONE.

fuck you ditchers.

悟

2011-04-25T20:45:00.003+08:00

Sport practices are dreadfully boring.

Dot dot dot.

I sang the i dont know what song for 3 times in my head. It was 9.15am.

I stood up and marched around. It was 9.16am.

KILL MEEEEEE!

I just woke up from my 2 hour nap. I feel so good, im going back to sleep.

Jealous? :)

happiness.

2011-04-20T22:12:00.000+08:00

快乐是什么？

“快乐就是当我失去我认为重要的人或事物时，我不会太难过。”

WAH.

Price tag

2011-04-18T17:29:00.001+08:00

AHHHH. I have to stop eating and start swimming.

My thighs are so flabby, they look like

so, when are we gonna swim, stella? :)

Cha Ching.

2011-04-16T22:11:00.004+08:00

HI.

I sincerely hate PMR. I have to go to school for the PMR study skills thing on a saturday and SUNDAY.

And, i have to finish this dessert my mom made.

Im so tired, i can slam my face on the dessert.

Pathetic saturday night.

goodnight.

Laugh

2011-04-11T18:57:00.003+08:00

你好！：）

I read someone's blog last night and found out how upset she was with us. Im really sorry for what we've said or done that offended you. We were just joking and definitely not insulting you, neither are we teasing you, in a bad way. We were just joking, i hope you understand and just get over it. I will never ever joke around with you again, i promise.

Be happy. :)

I had loads of fun with the girls today. Although, i was a bit tired. Wonder why they wont stop laughing. -_________-

Okay okay, imma go study now.

Please remind me to post Lam's favorite picture on her birthday. ;D

Rite, lam? *wink wink* ;))))

Good night :)

Im done with you

2011-04-06T19:31:00.002+08:00

Hello, again! :)

I just had mashed potatoes for dinner, hi jia yee! *flashing the L sign*

Drill is next week and i really really need more time to study. Please let the papers be easy! :(

How do i study all 8 subjects in 5 days? I need to catch up fast. My brain's full of shit and i need a damn break. I should've put in more effort my studies for the last two years. Then, maybe, it wouldn't be so hard now.

Wait till PMR's over, then its joy to the world!

But now, study jessica, study! Why cant's i get brains where i can memorize something after one glance of it? Why is studying entirely futile to me? :(

Okay, gonna go study, again. Bye!

8-)

Tell the world.

2011-04-06T16:48:00.001+08:00

HIIIII!

AHHHHH.

Lam wants me to study maths and bm today. Update later. :)

SOH CAH TOA,

I love you.

lie

2011-04-05T19:09:00.002+08:00

HI :)

I promised Lam that i'll study and will only go online at 10pm.

I really dont know why i promised her. WHY?

omg. -______-

Okay, i shall go study and not let her see me.

BYE! :)

Imagine.

2011-04-04T21:50:00.002+08:00

My mom said this to me: I think you're treating the maids really badly. You shout at them for no reasons sometimes. No, you shout at them most of the times.

I replied her: No mom, you dont understand. They wont listen to me. Everytime i call them out from their room when they're having their NAP, they wont listen, they'll just sleep as if they're deaf / dead. Im not you, they're not scared.

Mom: No, it's your own problem. You cannot blame them.

_____________________________________________________________________

10 minutes later,

*SHOUTS*

OI!!!!! NOT LIKE THAT, KQWEJXNIU HWFJOQEWRKNFJEHRFSDOWQLKJEND

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

!@#$%^*&(&^%$#@!#$%^&*(*#$@#@*

Did i just heard mom shouting at the maids? :O

So do you still think it's all my fault,

mom?

I find it quite hard to communicate with my mom these days. Maybe it's because that i've been with her all the time, where my brothers would hardly be with her. She tend to care for my brothers more. I dont know.

I know i update too much in a day.

Signing off now, good night :)

Coming home.

2011-04-04T19:23:00.003+08:00

Hi everybody!

My day was fine today. :)

UNTIL, i found out something really scary.

Have you realized that it's been really quite today? I went down to the swimming pool area with Stella to meet my coach after school. She told us that our training had been canceled. CANCELED! permanently canceled. :( And she'd resigned from Cempaka already, as expected. :)

So, i went up to the car park to meet Jia Yee. She accompanied me to the office and made my phone call. Then we went to the South Hall to look for her brother. It was only 3.40pm and the school was dead quite. Only a few basketballers were in the South Hall. We couldnt find him anywhere upstairs, so we went down to the field.

GUESS WHAT!

the field was EMPTY. yes, i did not see a single person on the field today. And there were only a few swimmers swimming. We went up to the car park and realized how quite it was today. Jia Yee said that I may not see her tomorrow. (claps)

I went home and there were no cars on the streets. Even the highways. I only waited once for the traffic light that i usually had to wait for around, 15 minutes. I reached home and realized how HOT the weather was. The sun was bearing down like a burning iron.

AHHHHHHH. Freaked me out like hell.

And the scariest thing was. This thing i said to myself last night.

1. My brother told me that he'd get McD for me for breakfast today when he fetches his girlfriend to the airport in the morning.

I told myself that it was impossible. Either he'd come home late, or they might oversleep and miss the flight.

2. I hope it wouldnt rain the next morning.

3. I hope there's water supply the next morning, as i havent wash my hair yesterday.

AND

YOU

KNOW

WHAT?

My brother overslept and his girlfriend missed her flight;

It rained this morning and i almost freeze to death;

There was no water supply.

AND,

just when i wanted to go out to switch on the water heater, my door was locked.

SINCE WHEN DID I LOCK MY DOOR?

crap.

What the hell is going on?

I have this feeling that the world is gonna end.

(cringe)

2011-04-04T07:24:00.001+08:00

早安：）

at least i still have you.

2011-03-31T19:41:00.004+08:00

SELADANG, Y U NO WIN BADMINTON?!?!?!?

This week's been passing by real fast. This week is all about games carnival and sports and sports and sports and sweat.

Im really lazy to blog. Pictures will be uploaded tomorrow ;)

It's friday tomorrow. FUN FUN FUN FUN.

ALSO,

it's

APRIL FOOLS tomorrow.

HEHEHEHE.

you so duh dead.

Why?

2011-03-30T18:31:00.013+08:00

What's with this god damn feeling, this feeling that's constantly, mentally killing me?

I've a family that i love. I've three brothers whom are quite close and i always have this wall with them since im the youngest and the only girl in the family. I've a mom who loves me but loves my brothers more (i think). I know tons of people but i just dont get close with anyone. And people whom i get close with tend to leave all the time.

I've always got criticize on my looks, my body, my lifestyle, my family, my friends and everything. Im not whatever great person, i dont do as much goods. Im not very bright nor anywhere smart. Im always bad tempered and i hold grudges for a few days. I wish i could love more people and understand more people. But the problem is, i have no idea how to do that. Im not very lady like and i have no doubts that i am ugly. I dont expect having loads of friends, friends that are popular and friends that are 'cool'.

But i do expect having long lasting friendships. I once thought that being alone was okay. But suddenly, it matters. All the close friends are changing. How is it possible? They've been my closest friends for these past few years, the bestest friends i could ever have. It's hard to admit this, but we're all falling apart.

I was expecting a better games carnival this year. Despite the fact that we've already had so much fun last year, i was still expecting a better games carnival this year. But the day wasn't even close to whatever i was expecting.

Why are things changing?

Why cant things go back the way they were before?

WHY?

Well, bad things happen for better things to happen. Anyway, i had a great day with Jia Yee, Rachel and Stella ;D

Something wonderfully strange happened, something really unexpected ;)

Games Carnival 2011

Good night. :)

first step

2011-03-29T21:40:00.003+08:00

HI HI HI HI HI HI HI.

i just came back from Singapore.

Miss me?

8-)

I reached home at 2.30am last night and i only slept for 4 hours. Thank god it's games carnival.

Im going to bed NOW.

goodnight.

GO REBECCA BLACK.

oh, did you know that the Friday song was auto tuned? But it still sucks.

TUESDAY TUESDAY.

Everybody's looking forward to the weekend, weekend.

2011-03-25T21:37:00.001+08:00

It's Friday Friday, gonna get down on Friday.

FUN FUN FUN FUN.

how can this stupid song get so addictive?????

quack quack..

BOOOH.

2011-03-23T21:33:00.002+08:00

OMG.

MATHS IS DRIVING ME CRAZY. WHY WONT I GET YOU RIGHT?!?

Congratulations CowCeong. :)

I hope you're happy with your results. Looking forward for your dominos ;)

dot.

2011-03-21T21:07:00.002+08:00

Okay sorry, i just have to say this. This is the last last last last time im saying this, i promise.

LOOK IN THE MIRROR!

double vision

2011-03-20T21:06:00.001+08:00

HIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHI!

It's SUNDAY already! :(

My dad's coming back from India today. I wonder what he got me.

Curry powder? Sari?

I really dont want holidays to end. :(

Okay, drama-time.

BYE! :D

Grenade

2011-03-19T20:54:00.004+08:00

HELLO!

It's Saturday already. :(

I have 6 more set papers to go. I've been doing homework for the whole day. I have to finish them today.

If only homework was watching drama, i would do homework 24 hours non-stop.

First of all,

I was thinking if maybe some people should learn before they speak or say something like. Did you actually looked at yourself before you start calling people names? Like how some people call others LALAs, by judging on what they wear, what they do to their faces, what kind of make up their putting on.

Im not criticizing anything, but i think that this is somehow unfair. Im not gonna say something like, "look into the mirror" or whatsoever, because i know that it hurts and it's never a good thing to say.

So now, im challenging myself not to criticize about anyone and anything.

Please remind me if i do so. ;)

Secondly,

I wish i could manage myself more. I wish i could be more discipline and stop eating so much. I've realized how GIGANTIC my thighs are, but i cant help but eat eat eat eat and eat.

Thirdly,

i wish i can stop watching drama and concentrate on my studies. Although i'm applying to transfer to an international school, i still have to study hard, it's PMR year. I dont wanna fail.

Im so gonna work hard. (i hope)

I gotta go WORK HARD!

ciao!

I dont wanna dance

2011-03-16T00:01:00.004+08:00

good midnight everyone! its 12.01 AM now :)

I know its late (for me and bunny) but tomorrow's a holiday, so i allow myself to sleep late today :D

I havent been realizing the time as i was playing the piano. I learnt to play Tong Hua. Okay, i know im really noob.

I was practically inspired by my cousin. I cannot believe that he can play any song. Just ANY song in his mind, any song you request. So, i got motivated and i started catching up with it. I havent been playing the piano for ages. I dont know how long exactly, but, i know it's been really long since i've touched the piano. I think i played for 3 hours. I dont remember all the notes already and i am pretty sure that i have improved in sight reading. 8-)

It's Tuesday already. I havent started with ANY set papers. If i dont doing them then i will experience something similar to the Japan Tsunami, or maybe worst. I will not have time tomorrow as i have to attend a funeral. :( I hate funerals. i hate all the sobbing and crying and hugging and consoling and everything.

I think i should starting working on the set papers right after im done blogging, if possible.

To be perfectly frank, i secretly want 2012 to happen. Not to mention that i sympathize Japan a lot. But, i think it'll be nice.

If 2012 is going to happen, i dont understand why im waking up so early in the morning for school and doing all the set papers. We're all gonna die anyway.

i think i change my mind about doing the set papers.

But i still have to do. Due dates are next week. :(

I think you guys should enjoy life before 2012 hits. Do everything you wanna do ;)

WHY INTERNET CONNECTION SO SLOW??!?!

2011-03-14T17:21:00.000+08:00

I miss having you to myself.

Always

2011-03-13T00:00:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY APRIL FOOOOOOL!

Happy Sweet 15!

Have fun with your BEST FRIENDS :D

Boom Boom Shake Shake

2011-03-12T23:16:00.009+08:00

Okay, so people are starting to complaint about how my blog's dead and stinks.

I've heard that my cousin ran away from home. Well, all of us had been expecting this. As how controlling her mom is. Im not saying that how she's teacher her children is wrong. But her mother should realize that this is not how you should teach your children in this century. Please, this is the 21st century. You cannot expect your daughter to wear long skirts and long sleeves all the time. A little bit of spaghetti strap wont kill. I cannot imagine what will happen if her mom finds out about her boyfriend. Her mom would most probably murder her.

So, me and my other cousin was trying to help her. If her mother makes a police report and if she gets caught, she'll be going to girlshome.

I added her boyfriend on facebook, and the next thing i found out was that she un-friended me and my other cousin on facebook.

I was so pissed off. Only i can un-friend people, nobody can un-friend me. I dont wanna care about her already. Waste my time, like i having nothing better to do.

I just came back from the hospital. One of my mother's manager is in the hospital and suffering from breast cancer. This is the first time im attending these hospital visit. I feel so bad. I usually just show her a fake smile everytime i see her. I didnt really bother to talk to her or whatsoever. And now, there's never a chance to see her serving me and asking how i am. I dont have a chance to talk to her anymore.

I just hope she would rest in peace.

I just watched all the videos and news about the tsunami in Japan with my parents. It really freaks me out. It makes me feels like its the end of the world, like 2012.

My mom's been planning to go to Japan this April. Which is, next month. And the worst thing is, she payed the deposits already. RM9000++

Jia Yee's been complaining about how short my blog posts are. so, to make my blog "less-boring"...

goodnight :)

Vanilla Twilight

2011-03-08T08:37:00.002+08:00

Good morning readers! :D

soooo looking forward for today.

Today's a full day chat day with Jia Yee. I hope my stomach doesn't hurts.

The company's having their annual dinner today. I hope it wont be boring.

pleaseeeeee.

okay, i gotta go for the PA practice thing.

See you later!

Bye! :D

Make a Wish

2011-03-07T19:33:00.003+08:00

SOOOOOO,

i've heard that most of ya'll have exams? :D

Yes, i dont. ;)

But obviously, there's nothing to be proud of, we have HOLIDAY tutorials.

I've made a decision to finish Cinderella's Sister by this week. It's weird how im watching drama like im doing homework. I'm taking my day, i mean, my night off for today. No homework due this week, well, no classes.

Oh, i just love performances. Especially when they give us FULL DAY rehearsals.

It's really hard to finish watching a drama when you totally lost interest in it. That's why its a bad idea to air it ONCE a week. Waiting for a drama to finish airing really annoys me. It makes everything so not exciting anymore.

Okay, byeeee :)

jealousy is beauty, not.

2011-03-07T12:13:00.000+08:00

im sorry.

Sometimes i get jealous thinking that someone else could make you happier than i could.

one day i will

2011-03-06T20:26:00.004+08:00

I feel so numb :(

and no, it's not period.

Okay, maybe this is what they meant by "emotional changes" during puberty.

But why wont i grow taller?????!!!!

Im not looking forward for this march holidays.

We have 2 days of tutorial. TWO DAYS. not "tutorial", but SCHOOL on the holiday. TWO DAYS OF SCHOOL ON A ONE WEEK HOLIDAY.

8am-3.30pm.

yeah, all thanks to PMR. love you so much.

2011-03-04T19:57:00.002+08:00

Look, im trying my best to be really really really very very very very super super super super friendly here.

like we used to.

2011-03-03T22:49:00.005+08:00

After one WHOLE week of school, okay not whole week, 4 days of school, it's finally FRIDAY, ~~tomorrow~~! I've realized how HARD it is to register all the new chapters of 8 subjects into my brain. Can die memorizing and studying everything.

I hate Science Chapter 4. I have no idea why we have to study the reproduction of plants, not like i care. And why do come up with SO MANY methods to prevent pregnancy and blah blah blah. why can't men just use condoms? -________-

PMR is really killing me.

The thought of transferring school is great. But then i'll have to make friends all over again which seems so hard to start everything all over again in a completely different place, not completely though, im still in malaysia, of course.

If I move on and make new friends, i'll definitely forget about all my best friends like April, Hui En, Jia Yee, Stella and everyone else im hanging out with now. I feel like im about to abandon them like how i've abandoned my primary school friends. i feel really bad and its sad when all the best memories we had together just flash through your head. I try to not make any more good memories with them already, just incase. ;)

Well, not like we cannot catch up with each other anymore, we can still go out and meet each other every week for lunch. But, we'll definitely drift apart, even if we have meetings and gatherings often. Somehow i think that there isn't anything common to talk about like how we are right now. And there is barely anything we're gonna experience together anymore. Communicating with each other might be awkward cause we are no longer closest friends. We meet new best friends and forget about the old ones.

Im afraid that i will not miss them and lose all my attachments with all these awesome people.

HOW CAN I DO THAT?

What if one day we walk pass each other, but all we do is just wave or smile. Maybe I wont even bother and pretend not to see them. WHAT TO DO???

I always think friends are come-and-go. Well, they will move on too, of course.

I really find it hard to let them go. The thought of not walking together, not hanging around the corridor together, not going to the toilet together, not gossiping together, sharing homework and doing practically almost everything together makes my heart bleed.

But maybe transferring school is also a very good idea. since i have a really bad reputation in school already. Maybe everyone would just forget me. :)

Im really sick of all the fights and all the i hate you you hate me thing. I hope everything would be better.

I dont know why, but i hate goodbyes.

Dear God, please give me a better tomorrow.

Good night :)

Like a Star

2011-03-01T23:08:00.002+08:00

HI HI HI HI HI HI.

sorry for not updating, i totally forgotten about my blog.

11.10pm, school tomorrow, and i havent bath.

JESSICA YEONG. ;D

Will update tomorrow, if possible ;)

Good night noobs. :)

The Game

2011-02-25T23:45:00.002+08:00

ohmygod.

swimming gala is tomorrow. The performance is tomorrow!

What if i forget my moves?

Crap, it makes me sick to my stomach.

my attitude is bitch

2011-02-25T21:41:00.001+08:00

when you get close to guys, they call you a bitch.

when you talk to the guys they like, they call you a bitch.

when you dont get along with anyone, they call you a bitch.

when they shout your name and you answer them, they call you a bitch.

when you see them and not saying hi to them, they call you a bitch.

when you're playing the badminton on a perfect court with nets and stuff, they'll shout at you rudely to go away to let them use it. and when you tell them to wait, they call you a bitch.

when you hang out and laugh with your friends, they call you a bitch.

when you did nothing, they call you a bitch.

wth is wrong with people nowadays? im starting to hate this world.

Tell Me Why

2011-02-23T23:35:00.000+08:00

oh my god. only 2 people visited my blog.

-_________-

Take care, my bus!

2011-02-21T18:52:00.002+08:00

HIIIII :)

Im so tired. :(

BUTTTTTT

i have maths to do. it's annoying when i open a page, look at a question and dont understand a single shit of it. I do try to look for answer but looking for the maths teacher if just useless, especially asking about questions and formulas, because all she do is repeat the same thing all over and over and over and over again. But when you still dont understand and you ask the same question over and over again, she'll repeat the same explanation over and over and over and over and over again. but that's still not the worst.

she'll start screaming and screaming and screaming until you give up and you'll just agree with everything she says.

UNDERSTAND????

I dont think i should blame her. because she's a qualified teacher in my school and maybe im the one who is unqualified, you know?

But i wouldn't call myself stupid ;D

Im really curious if anyone's actually reading my blog.

LEAVE A MESSAGE ON MY CBOX!

wait, i dont have one.

-_______________-

nevermind.

I'll update as soon as i get my maths homework done. ;)

We'll be alright.

2011-02-20T18:35:00.000+08:00

HI BLOGGER HI!

I guess im back blogging after i dont know how long.

It feels weird to tell the whole world about everything im doing -_________-

This time, i WILL update my blog.

If you read, I blog. Deal?

ohmygod, what to eat for dinner?

McDonalds? 8D